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Mum self care

There is always a Solution – Workbook

by Busymumhacks June 6, 2023
written by Busymumhacks

Every challenge holds a solution. 

Just believing that a solution exists is incredibly powerful. 

This belief gives me hope, faith and confidence.

It is easier to search for a solution when I am convinced that one exists.

Hope is the strongest pillar that protects the entire world – Sri Chinmoy

I refuse to give up when I know there is a solution.

I put on my thinking cap and do my best to find the optimal solution to any situation. 

I can persevere when I know there is an answer. 

I commit myself to finding that answer.

I have courage to ask directions.

During those times I am facing a huge challenge, I remind myself that I can find a way to solve my dilemma.

I relax and allow myself to see all the possibilities. 

I use my creativity and previous experiences.

I meditate.

Once I let go of my stress, my mind presents me with the best way to deal with my challenge. 

I can always find a solution.

Even the direst of situations has a solution. 

I can persist in any situation. 

I am tenacious and strong-willed.

I keep working toward a solution with the faith that it will be revealed when the time is right.

Today, when I have a challenge, I get busy and look for a solution right away.

I am optimistic that I can find it.

There is always a solution, and I know that I am capable of discovering it.

Self-Reflection Questions:

  1. What are my current challenges? Am I working hard to find solutions to those challenges?
  2. What are some clever solutions I have found to previous challenges in my life?
  3. What are solutions I have found that didn’t work therefore need to find another way of resolutions?
  4. Do I give up too soon to find solutions to my challenges? What does this behavior cost me?
  5. Do I need to find help?

Download the workbook here.

Busymumhacks x

 

June 6, 2023 0 comment
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Money management

Child Age-Appropriate Money Management

by Busymumhacks May 31, 2023
written by Busymumhacks

Do you know how to manage your money? Did you learn about money management when growing up?

I can’t remember exactly when I started to receive the weekly allowance from my parents during my school time, but it would be at least junior high school   time. What I remember is I received it without the need of doing any housework at home. My job was to study and make sure that I passed my exam to go to the next level.

I had lunch prepared so I could save all the allowance or to buy whatever I wanted. I was given the freedom to choose my options. I saved it weekly and then spent it at the end of the month. My late father was quite relaxed about it, but my mother was quite vocal about what I spent on.

I didn’t use the money to buy cigarettes or illicit drugs. I bought bits and bobs from Sanrio collection (if you know what I am talking about) or gifts for friends’ birthday or basic cosmetics.

Do I wish it would be different?

At the time obviously, I was annoyed with my mother. Now I wish that she could be more prescriptive on how I treated my money instead of just being vocal without any further explanation. She wasn’t good at money management so I guess she knew what she knew at the time so couldn’t teach me any better.

Fast forward, I am a Qualified Accountant therefore I know much better about money management. I am the bridge between my ancestor and the future generation, so I am keen to teach my son healthy financial habits early.

At 5 years old, he understands money to some extent such as: No money then can’t buy anything. Why does mommy need to go to work to get money so we can buy our necessities? When he was younger when I said to him that I have no money in the shop when he wanted to buy toys and he used to answer me “Just pay with your card then”.

He wasn’t wrong because we are living in the cashless era, and he hardly ever saw hard cash. 

Currently, ATMs are disappearing rapidly in Australia. It is a concerning matter because cash is meant to be the King. Well, finally there is a King of our money otherwise cash is still the Queen (*chuckles).

Teaching young children about money is an important part of helping them develop healthy financial habits. At the age of 5, children are just beginning to understand the value of money and how it is used. Coincidentally, we have started to read Barefoot Kids by Scott Pape. Read my other blog Tips on the family budget.

Here are some tips for teaching money concepts to 5-year-olds:

1. Start with the basics. 

At this age, it’s important to start with the basics. Introduce coins and notes to your child and teach them how to count money. You can use real coins and bills to help your child learn and play games that involve counting money.

Note to self to take every note cash out from the bank to show what does Australian Dollar look like. We are not using the fake note because this will defeat the purpose of showing to pay in the shop.

2. Make it fun.

Learning about money should be fun and engaging for your child. You can play games like “store” where your child can practice buying and selling items with play money.

We play this game a lot, especially at the playground. 

We trade with bartering instead of money as I get ice cream from dry leave tree. Note to self, we could do this better.

3. Use clear jars for saving.

Using clear jars for saving can help your child see their progress and understand the concept of saving. Label each jar with a specific goal, such as “spending,” “saving,” and “giving,” and encourage your child to divide their money accordingly.

We have this jar given by Westpac when I set up his account when he was a few months old. 

The teller told us that he was the youngest customer she ever served. His title is Master. (*chuckles).

4. Teach delayed gratification.

Teach your child that sometimes they need to wait to get what they want. For example, if your child wants a toy, encourage them to save their money over time to buy it, rather than buying it immediately.

He is into Avengers Lego currently and he wanted to buy this set that cost $62 after a discount. I told him that I will pay for this toy in advance in return if he completed his job (opening the front door) every day for 13 weeks. He waited for the delivery and commented that they were kind to send it quite early for him. He completed his job for 3 weeks now.

5. Discuss wants vs. needs.

At this age, children can begin to understand the difference between wants and needs. Explain to your child that some things, like food and shelter, are needs, while toys and treats are wants.

Currently, we are at the rate of buying new shoes at least 3-4 pairs a year not for style but for his growing feet. The other day, we went to the shoe store and upon trying many shoes, he said that he wants 2 pairs of casual shoes. I briefly mentioned to him about wanting and needing just to buy 1 pair of casual shoes because I know that we are still going to get soccer shoes and summer sandals.

6. Lead by example.

Children learn by example, so model healthy financial habits for your child. Show them how you save money and make smart financial decisions.

We have started to talk about investment lightly. 

I told him that I put aside $20 every month for him so we can buy shares and grow it. He knows about the number so I told him that the $20 can become $100 then $1,000. He was super excited about it. I linked the discussion between want and need. We sell his old toys for cheap also to teach him that he can save money instead of having too many toys.

7. Encourage giving.

Teaching your child about giving back can help instil positive values and a sense of community. Encourage your child to donate a portion of their money to a charity of their choice.

I must admit that I’m struggling with this one because he doesn’t grasp the concept although I donate online to charities and give away unused stuff around the house for free. I must think of a way so he can see it with his eyes.

You can try some of the tips above but remember to keep it simple and age-appropriate for your child. You don’t need to overwhelm them with too much information at once. By introducing basic financial concepts early on, you can help your child develop a positive relationship with money that will serve them well in the future.

To plant a garden is to believe in tomorrow – Audrey Hepburn

Best wishes.

Busymumhacks x

 

May 31, 2023 0 comment
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Family friendly recipes

Make Meal Planning as Part of Your Routine

by Busymumhacks May 25, 2023
written by Busymumhacks

How many times a week do you do takeaways?

Do you run out of ideas about what is for dinner during lunchtime?

Do you get frustrated when your family don’t eat the prepared meal?

Do you have time after work to prepare dinner? 

I have been there, done with that and won’t want to go back to a stressful daily meal time.

I am an independent mum and work full-time. My days are busy in the office, so I don’t have time to think about lunch or dinner during the day. Unless, there is no food left in the fridge at home.

Meal planning is a great way to save time, money, and reduce stress to preparing meals for the family. This blog is an expansion of my other blog: tips for family budget.

Whether you are a busy professional, a stay-at-home parent, or somewhere in between, meal planning can help you stay organised, eat healthier, keep your kitchen clean on weekdays because you don’t turn on your stove and make the most of your grocery budget.

Here are some tips for successful meal planning:

1. Set aside time.

Schedule a specific time each week to plan your meals for the upcoming week. This could be a Sunday afternoon or any other day that works for you.

Mine is Sunday evening given that I have shopped all ingredients ahead of the preparation/cooking time.  

2. Take inventory.

Before planning your meals, check what you have in your pantry, fridge, and freezer. This will help you avoid buying unnecessary items and save money.

You would be surprised by how many inventories you have at home. 

I don’t collect spices jars. I have the usual spices I usually use, so when I finish, I refill it from Bulk Source shop.

3. Plan your meals.

Start by deciding what meals you want to make for the week. Consider your schedule, dietary restrictions, and preferences. Make a list of the meals you want to prepare, including breakfast, lunch, dinner, and snacks.

4. Create a shopping list based on your menu.

Once you have your meal plan, create a shopping list based on the ingredients you need for each meal. Stick to your list to avoid impulse purchases. Where possible, buy the ingredients in bulk and without the plastic tray because the weight of your meat is including the tray.

I have been utilising the monthly 10% discount from Woolworth card and gift voucher to stretch my money further. I do big mothly shopping while fresh veggies and fruits could be weekly as it is cheaper to buy seasonal vegetables and fruits.

My weak spot is snacks! You’d know what I mean by being Asian, there are so many old snacks that when you see them, it brings memory of your childhood so you must get it and there are so many new snacks that you heard about and want to try it. Can you see the circle of death of snacks?

5. Batch cook.

Consider batch-cooking meals that can be used for multiple meals throughout the week or freeze them so they can be used for any week. For example, you can cook a big pot of chilli or soup and use it for lunch and dinner throughout the week.

My favourite batch cook is bolognese sauce, lasagne, wonton and chicken nuggets.

6. Prep in advance.

Prep ingredients in advance, such as chopping vegetable s or cooking rice will save you time during the week when you are busy. Before owning a Thermomix, my go to is the slow cooker/crockpot. You can put all ingredients in before you go to work and the meal will be ready when you come home after work. This is great for any season, especially during winter.

I cook rice in the rice cooker for a couple of days as soon as I get home. It will be ready when I finish my shower. I only reheat meal as required so it doesn’t get contaminated with going through many reheats.

7. Mix it up.

Be adventurous to try new recipes and mix up your meal plan. This will keep things interesting and help you discover new favourite dishes or old memory dishes.

I have Thermomix therefore, cuisine that caught my eye would be an adventure for my eyes to try. 

I found many recipes that remind me of my childhood. I keep cooking them because I miss the flavour.

By implementing these tips, meal planning can become an enjoyable and stress-free process. Not only will you save time and money, but you will also be able to eat healthier, more delicious meals, have spare time during the week after work to spend with your loved ones and less work on cleaning the kitchen because you only cook once.

So why not give meal planning a try and see how it can make your life easier and more enjoyable?

I hope you would try to implement it.

Happy meal planning!

Be well.

Busymumhacks x

 

May 25, 2023 0 comment
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Mum self care

Ancestor Before Me and Future Generation After Me

by Busymumhacks May 19, 2023
written by Busymumhacks

Do you pray to your ancestor?

How do you pray for your ancestor?

How do you acknowledge your ancestor?

I grew up with praying for my ancestor at least once a year. I grew up in a modern world, so the ritual seems irrational: offering food, incense and flowers for the ancestor who can no longer eat and smell. My late father was not a full supporter of strict tradition, although my mum is still following the strict tradition to some extent. My late father was a rational man. Therefore, he was cremated while his ashes scattered to the ocean.

He knew that the future generations would get tied down to visiting the cemetery and creating pressure to look after the physical grave. In his rational mind, the descendants can always go to the beach wherever they are: to be one in nature. My mum went to her hometown with her families.

I can’t help wanting to find out if my family is the odd one. When researching, I was surprised the ancestor worship or praying to ancestors is common practice in many cultures. I was relieved that we are not strange: we are part of something larger than ourselves.  

Here are some examples of different cultures honour their ancestors:

China

Ancestor worship is ingrained in Chinese culture, and it is believed that ancestors have the power to protect and bless their living descendants. The practice involves offering food, incense, and other offerings at ancestral altars, and performing rituals during important family occasions.

The Aboriginal cultures of Australia 

The Aboriginal cultures have a strong tradition of ancestor worship and spirituality. The praying to ancestors is deeply rooted in their culture and worldview and reflects their unique relationship to the land and the natural world. 

Japan

Ancestor worship is known as “kuyo,” and it involves offerings of food and incense to ancestors, as well as visits to gravesites during the annual Obon festival.

 

Mexico

The Day of the Dead is a traditional holiday where families honour their deceased loved ones by building altars decorated with flowers, candles, and photographs of their ancestors. The offerings of food and drink on the altars as a way of welcoming the spirits of the dead back to the living world.

Africa

It is a common practice in many African cultures to believe that ancestors have the power to protect and guide their living descendants. In some traditions, the offerings of food and drink at ancestral shrines and rituals performing to communicate with the spirits of the ancestors.

Native American cultures

Many Native American tribes have a strong tradition of honouring their ancestors, with practices that vary widely depending on the tribe. Some tribes believe their ancestors can offer guidance and protection, and they perform rituals and ceremonies to honour their memory.

This year is the second time that our family in Australia is practising the Qing Ming ritual. I consciously made the decision to ensure that my son knows his ancestor and he feels that he connects to his ancestor. My late father did not have the opportunity to meet my son in person. Read another blog on my father’s day – coping with grief. 

You can imagine how hard it was for me to explain this ritual to my son. Last night, coincidently we watched Dr Strange, so my son somewhat got an idea of spirit. My son funnily had a concept and said that the spirit is his second layer of body after his skin in the scene that Dr Strange’s spirit is separated from his body. 

Praying to ancestors can shape a generation in several ways such as:

Cultural identity

It is often an important part of a culture’s traditions and values. By practicing this tradition, individuals can feel a sense of connection to their cultural roots and a stronger sense of identity.

Family cohesion

In many cultures, it is a family affair. Family members may come together to perform rituals and offer prayers, which can strengthen family bonds and foster a sense of community.

Ethical values

It can also reinforce ethical values and moral principles. For example, in some cultures, it is believed that ancestors can offer guidance and protection, but they can also punish wrongdoing. By honouring ancestors and seeking their guidance, individuals may be motivated to act in accordance with their cultural values and avoid behaviour that would dishonour their ancestors.

Sense of continuity

It can provide a sense of continuity between past, present, and future generations. By honouring the memory of their ancestors, individuals can feel a sense of connection to their past and a responsibility to pass on their traditions and values to future generations.

At the end, write your story but remember where you are coming from. You are the bridge between the ancestor and the future generation.

Be well.

Busymumhacks x

 

May 19, 2023 0 comment
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Mum self care

Celebrating Mother

by Busymumhacks May 14, 2023
written by Busymumhacks

International Mother’s Day is just around the corner.

Mother’s Day is a special occasion to celebrate the love and sacrifices of all the mothers in the world. My heart goes to mothers who were pregnant but never held the baby in their arms and mothers who gave birth but held the baby in their arms in just a tiny window on earth. You are still a mother.

For single mothers, it can be a challenging day as they carry the weight of the world on their shoulders. As a working single mother, you may feel like you have to do it all alone, but you are not alone, and you deserve to be celebrated on this special day.

I am speaking for myself. My first Mother’s Day celebration wasn’t like the one that I’d wished to happen, but I am at peace with the past. It was just a day in many years, but I have the best gift for having my beautiful son.

The truth is again, with the commercialisation and after Covid, Mother’s Day celebrations make another comeback with gifts and overbooked restaurants for dinners and lunches. The expectation is high and because of that some mothers have started to feel the pressure of comparing their celebration day with other mothers.

Just stop doing that if you are doing it!

Well done if you are just being you without brushing it off to make you feel better.  

Well done if you are conscious and at peace that life is so much more than one day of celebration of being a mother.

I am giving the idea to celebrate Mother’s Day as a single mum while I understand that sometime even when you are in a healthy relationship, your Mother’s Day may be just a dream too.

Here are some ideas to help you celebrate Mother’s Day:

1. Take a break.

As a mum, you are always on the go, taking care of your child’s needs, work, and household chores. On Mother’s Day, take a break from your routine and do something that you enjoy or just do nothing. It could be as simple as taking a long bath, reading a book, having a quiet cup of tea at home or watching your favourite movie.

2. Connect with other mums.

Connect with other mums in your community or online. Share your experiences and support each other. You can plan a virtual celebration or a small gathering with your children.

3. Call your mums or in-laws or grandmothers.

They are the most important mums in your life. Lead by example to your little one. For me, it was a conscious effort so my son can learn how to treat mothers in his life.

4. Have a picnic.

Have a picnic with your child in the park or your backyard. Pack your favourite foods, games, and a blanket. Enjoy the fresh air, nature, and quality time with your child.

5. Treat yourself.

Treat yourself to something special, like a massage, a new outfit, or a favourite dessert. You deserve to pamper yourself and feel appreciated.

6. Create a memory box.

Create a memory box with your child, filled with pictures, letters, and special moments you shared. This will be a meaningful gift that you can cherish for years to come.  

Last year, my sister-in-law arranged a surprise gift for my son to give to me. She is just a lovely person. Otherwise, I just sat at home enjoying a cup of my favourite tea then with another surprise my Mother-In-Law came so we celebrated together with bubbles.

This year, because we will be in Gold Coast, we will be having dolphin encountered activities at Sea World to create the memory. It is a surprise for my son, and he’d love it.

7. Write a gratitude letter.

Write a gratitude letter to yourself or a loved one, thanking them for their love, support, and sacrifices. This will be a reminder of how much you are appreciated and loved. I have a gratitude journal and this year, I will be writing raising you journal.

Mother’s Day is about celebrating the love and sacrifices of all the mothers. Take the time to appreciate yourself, connect with others, and create special memories with your child. You are strong, resilient, and deserving of all the love and celebration on this special day.

Happy Mother’s Day!

Busymumhacks x

 

May 14, 2023 0 comment
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Mum self care

Simple and Practical Hacks to Balancing Work and Home Life as a Career Mum

by Busymumhacks May 9, 2023
written by Busymumhacks

In today’s world, it’s increasingly challenging to balance work and home life as a career mum.  It is double the weight when you are an independent mum.  Unlike other families with two incomes, a single mum only has one option which is to earn money however way it is to continue living, to provide meals on the table.

Whether out of necessity or choice, juggling career and family responsibilities can be demanding. However, it is achievable with the right strategies in place.

Ultimately, the decision to continue working has its advantages. It saves you from worrying about re-entering the workforce later and enables you to build your own retirement funds. It keeps your sanity by being an active member of the community other than your child and family. It keeps your mind broader and your heart bigger. Read my other blog on Embracing Equity for working mum.

To maintain a happy equilibrium between work and home, the following scheduling and planning techniques can be helpful.

Plan and Schedule

Most working mums use specific scheduling and planning habits to stay on track. A fixed schedule that suits your preferences is essential.

Here are some hacks:

1. Plan mornings

Try completing some of your morning tasks the night or a few days before. Allocate enough time to get your children ready for the day if they’re too young to do it themselves. If possible, sit down for breakfast as a family before commencing your daily commitments.

2. Schedule events

Schedule your after-work events in a planner. This will ensure that everything has its place, and no important task is forgotten. Play dates, grocery shopping, and other errands can be scheduled as well.

3. Be flexible

Acknowledge that everything won’t always work out perfectly. If something doesn’t go according to plan, reschedule it for another day. With so many tasks to juggle, keeping a flexible schedule can help alleviate stress levels. To me, having a schedule means that I could be flexible enough because I know my capacities are instead of just thinking too busy to do anything.

Stay Involved

One of the most significant concerns of working mums is that they may not be involved enough. Here we go again: mum’s guilt. Please work on the mom guilt workbook.  We need to acknowledge the guilt to make peace with it and find the solution around it.  Working mums, this is our mantra: Quality over Quantity. Dedicating quality time to your children is crucial to staying connected with them. Although you may not be present every minute, you can still make a big difference in their lives. I attend school’s event once a term to ensure that I am involved with his community.

When you return home from work, engage in activities that you’ll all enjoy. While your children may want some independent playtime, you can demonstrate that you care by participating in family games or other activities. Mealtimes are also an excellent opportunity to connect with them. Our rule in the house is no phone during mealtime.  Sometimes, we break it by eating dinner at the couch in front of TV on Friday night. Try not to be so rigid.

Take Breaks


It is essential to plan breaks to recharge your batteries. You deserve “me time” occasionally, and downtime can help relieve stress. After the children have gone to bed, you could read a book, focus on your relationship with your partner, or participate in a relaxing activity. Please read on the blog on 8 ways to unwind for working mums.

Nurture Your Relationships

Spend one-on-one time with each family member. Even during life’s hectic times, don’t forget to prioritise your relationship with your loved ones. Individual attention can help you understand your children better and improve your relationships. As I don’t have a partner, people may say it is harder or easier, it is all relative opinions.  I don’t mind it as I divert my thoughts into something more positive than feeling lonely and feeling victimized. I usually try to connect with my friends or families, as they are my rocks. I am right here in the right place and at the right time.

Being a career mum is a remarkable accomplishment. 

Although life can be chaotic at times, these strategies can help you maintain a healthy balance between your work and home life.

Be well.

Busymumhacks x

May 9, 2023 0 comment
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Mum self care

8 Ways for Working Mums to Unwind at The End of The Day

by Busymumhacks April 27, 2023
written by Busymumhacks

As a working mum, it can be difficult to find any time for yourself. You work all day and then in the evening, it’s time to put your mum hat on and get the kids to bed – but not before you’ve made dinner, given them a bath, read them a story and all the other tasks you do as part of the bedtime routine. 

Then, when they’re finally asleep, as much as you’d like to put your feet up and watch TV, you spend your time washing up, tidying the toys away and preparing their bags and packed lunches for the following day. 

Sound familiar? 

As a single working mum, I find it really hard to make time for myself. My son sleeps with me, so doing anything after he goes to bed is difficult. I tend to try and get up earlier than him – sometimes 3am – to be productive and get stuff done. 

Being a working mum is a full-on job, but it’s important to wind down and take some time for yourself. That may sound totally unachievable, but it doesn’t have to mean you lock yourself away for hours, meditating. 

Work out when is the most feasible part of the day to grab some ‘me time’. It might mean getting up earlier than your kids or putting some time aside when everyone else is asleep, but it doesn’t have to be a long time. 

Everyone needs some me time occasionally. So, put the vacuum cleaner away – the hoovering can wait for another day – and try these quick fixes that you can easily slot into your routine to help you unwind…

1. Get outside

Getting out for some fresh air is a great way to unwind. Even just a walk around the block or the garden to collect your thoughts can really help you relax.

2. Phone a friend

Life gets so busy, we often forget about the friends we used to hang out with before kids. Having a chat with a friend can help your worries melt away. You don’t have to talk about your day if you don’t want to. Just chatting about the weather or reminiscing about that boy you both used to fancy can help you unwind. So, make some time to give that person a call. You’ll probably make their day too. 

3. Take a bath

A long, hot soak with your favourite bath oil is the perfect way to relax. If you don’t have the luxury of a bath or the time to do it justice, a hot shower can also help wash those troubles away. 

4. Dance like no one’s watching

Whether you like cheesy pop, heavy metal, or something more classical and instrumental, cranking up your favourite tune and dancing around the kitchen can help you escape the stress of it all, just for a few minutes. What’s more…you’ll be getting exercise at the same time, which is known to release endorphins and can improve your mood.

5. Cook your favourite meal

When we’re stressed or feeling down, we tend to eat. But instead
of ordering a takeaway, why not make your favourite meal from scratch? It might not sound like your idea of relaxing, especially when you’ve already cooked for the rest of the family, but taking the time to cook something delicious can really help you unwind. Plus, you get to enjoy eating it in peace!

6. Pamper yourself

When was the last time you put on a face mask or painted your nails? Why not turn your living room or bedroom into your very own salon and give yourself a pamper? If there’s someone around who can give you a massage, then that’s even better! After all, you deserve it!

7. Watch your favourite show 

Find some escapism by watching your favourite show or film. Something light-hearted and easy to watch can put a smile on your face and help you forget about your worries. 

8. Read

There’s nothing better than curling up and losing yourself in a good book to forget what’s going on in your world for a bit. Whether you like a romance, a crime thriller or an autobiography, reading is a great way to unwind.

These simple tasks don’t have to take very long. But, if you have the time, why not combine a few of them and enjoy some extended me time? The washing and cleaning can wait!

What’s your favourite way to unwind? 

Share your hack in the comment. 

Be well.

Busymumhacks x

April 27, 2023 0 comment
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Mum self care

Work-Life Balance for Busy Mum Assessment

by Busymumhacks March 27, 2023
written by Busymumhacks

Maintaining a healthy work-life balance protects you, busy mum from burnout and increases your productivity.

Setting reasonable boundaries gives you time and energy to devote to your relationships and other personal activities.

However, busy schedules and modern technology can make it difficult for busy mum to disconnect at the end of the workday unless you intentionally develop habits that help you to be fully present at home.

Rate how much you agree with the following statements on a scale of 1 (least) to 5 (most). Then, identify small changes that will help you to reduce stress and take care of each important aspect of your life.

1. I feel like I’m neglecting my responsibilities at home or work.
(Example: Rating 2. I will set realistic goals and give myself credit for my efforts and accomplishments.)

2. I ask others for help when I need it.
(Example: Rating 4. I will assign my children household chores appropriate for their ages.)

3. My priorities are clear.
(Example: Rating 4. I will plan my day each morning and block out hours for my most urgent and important tasks.)

4. I manage workplace stress effectively.
(Example: Rating 3. I will stretch or go for a walk when I feel tense.)

5. I avoid excessive overtime.
(Example: Rating 4. I will schedule challenging tasks for the hours when I am at peak performance, so I won’t have to stay late to complete them.)

Head to www.busymumhacks.com for related blogs about work life balance and read our latest blog Stop Hurrying and Start Living in Solitude!

March 27, 2023 0 comment
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Mum self care

Stop Hurrying and Start Living in Solitude!

by Busymumhacks March 26, 2023
written by Busymumhacks


Happy Solitude Day!

Busy mum, if you’re not getting enough things done on your to-do list, you’re not alone. It’s common to feel a little overwhelmed, rushed, and even guilty when you’re unable to get everything done each day. Staying focused at the moment and finding joy in the mundane life is challenging.

Then the little things seem to start piling up. The dishes are dirty and the laundry needs to be done. The only obvious solution is to be even busier and to schedule every minute of the day.

It is important to remember that nothing stays finished for a long. Most of us feel like everything has to be done before we give ourselves permission to enjoy life. However, that moment of feeling “caught up” never seems to come.

Sometimes, Let It Go and Let It Be can be your best friend.

If you need to create a little more space and enjoyment in your life without feeling guilty, try these hacks:

1. Learn to be glad that you have more work to do.
Remember, if you have more to do, your time is valuable. Imagine the implication of not having any tasks to complete at work. You’d likely be out of a job sooner, rather than later.

  • Be grateful that you can be purposeful to help other people in your life. However, learn to be assertive at the same time to say no when you have reached your limit.

2. Look for dead time.
You might believe that you’re busy 24/7, but that’s likely untrue. Use those moments between tasks to mentally relax. We all think much more than necessary.

If you’re working on a report at work, you’re probably also thinking about lunch, the unpaid bills, and what you’re going to do this weekend. None are helpful, nor do they help you get your report completed.

  • You’ll be much more relaxed and get more accomplished if you mentally limit yourself to the task at hand and focus on the progression. Having a nutritious meal is important so meal planning so you don’t have to think about it anymore once it is done on the weekend.


3. Slower can be faster.
The military has a saying, “Slow is smooth and smooth is fast.” Calmly approaching each task will frequently result in getting it done quicker. As our minds become overstimulated, it is much more challenging to stay focused. I meditate at a minimum of 5 minutes a day but have an amazing impact on the day. Read more on my other blog: Meditation helps me to set intentions for the day.

  • Think about how quickly you tie your shoes each day. Now try to tie your shoes as quickly as possible. You’ll almost certainly find that you’ve become slower. Any excessive increase in tension slows things down.

4. Limit unnecessary tasks.
There’s no point in spending valuable time on things that don’t matter. If you’re spending time on tasks that have little meaning, ditch or delegate them.

Be honest with yourself that you don’t like folding clothes so instead of avoiding the tasks, find a solution to resolve the tasks. My hack is to hang clothes onto the hanger straight away from the washing machine while it is wet but ensure fixing the crunches so when it is dry, it dries nicely and goes straight to the wardrobe pole.

I only iron when I need to. Although it is ironic thinking about how I used to iron all my clothes including underwear!

5. Limit the important tasks, too.
You can probably only get a few important tasks done each day. Making a list of 5 is certain to lead to feeling overwhelmed.

Pick the 2-3 most important tasks to focus on each day or week or month. The rest can wait until tomorrow. You may think that then you wouldn’t finish anything then. Do the best that you can, your old self will thank you for standing up for yourself. You know that you will do it or wake up early or stay up at night if it is an emergency.

6. Give yourself the time you need.
Everyone does some mental math each day that goes something like this, “This meeting ought to take 60 minutes. I’ll need 20 minutes to interview that job candidate. I have 30 minutes to drive home and change. Then, I still have 15 minutes to get Sarah to soccer practice.”

  • We all tend to be optimistic, and our mental schedule requires everything to go perfectly. The interview could take 20 minutes, at best. It might also take 40 minutes. It probably won’t take 10.
  • Be realistic and give yourself the time required for each task, as well as the time between tasks.
  • Have you heard of the Pomodoro technique? It is a kitchen timer to maximise productivity in 25 minutes.

If you’re constantly in a hurry, life can feel chaotic and joyless. Find solitude in what you do. Give yourself some solidity of being slack occasionally.

You have more time available than you realise. You can also learn to enjoy a busy schedule. Focus on each task and give yourself time to complete it.

Remember that remaining calm in solidity and slowing down can increase the amount you get accomplished.

Call to action : Challenge yourself to complete the work-life balance assessment and try some of the hacks to see if you feel any improvements in your life.

Remember, Rome wasn’t built on one night: a small step is more important than not doing any step at all.

Be well.

Happy Solitude Day! Busymumhacks x

March 26, 2023 0 comment
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Mum self care

Embracing Equity for Working Mums

by Busymumhacks March 8, 2023
written by Busymumhacks

Today is International Women’s Day while March month is marking Women’s month. It needs to be celebrated daily not just one day or just one month a year.

The theme for this year is to embrace equity.

Let’s peel this theme layer by layer.

To embrace equity means to actively work towards ensuring that everyone has equal access to opportunities, resources, and outcomes, regardless of their background or circumstances.

It involves recognising and addressing historical and systemic injustices that have created barriers and disparities for marginalized groups, such as people of colour, women, LGBTQ+ individuals, people with disabilities, and those living in poverty.

Embracing equity requires a commitment to diversity, inclusion, and social justice, and involves actively seeking out and valuing diverse perspectives and experiences.

It also means acknowledging and challenging biases and stereotypes, and creating a culture of respect and empathy where everyone feels valued and heard.

The history of women’s equity is a long and complex one, spanning centuries and continents. Women have been fighting for equality and recognition for their contributions to society for thousands of years, and while progress has been made, there is still much work to be done.

Today, women continue to face many challenges, including gender-based violence, pay inequity, and limited representation in political and corporate leadership roles.

However, the ongoing efforts of women’s rights activists have led to significant progress and increased awareness of the need for gender equity and equality.

The image below hits hard home.  I am a single working mum, so it is like having 2 jobs.  When I finish one job, I start the other job.  Both jobs are connected to some degree.

I am not discounting the fact that there are great partners or husbands out there who are helping with the house chores. 

I am glad that the housekeeping role is now more balanced, and I am also aware that in the complete family, some mums feel like single mum because all the housekeeping become mums’ tasks to complete.

In the traditional family life set up where only one parent is working while the other parent is staying at home to care for the children with the help of the village of extended families, mum’s life seems to be simple.

It would typically involve tasks such as cooking, cleaning, laundry, grocery shopping, and childcare. In many cultures, it was expected that the mother would stay at home full-time to take care of the family’s needs.

In comparison, where a mum is working, the daily chores include all the above tasks, as well as managing work responsibilities outside of the home. This can include commuting, attending meetings, responding to emails, and completing work assignments.

Working mums may also need to balance their work responsibilities with their children’s schedules, such as dropping them off at school or daycare, attending parent-teacher conferences, attending sports events, and helping with homework. 

While the daily chores of a mum have not changed drastically over time, the expectations, and pressures on working mums to balance their work and family responsibilities have increased significantly in recent years. 

This leads to burnout (Read my other blog on 5 steps to avoid burnout).

Every choice we make in life leads to different paths and I am all about taking reasonable risks in life, but we need to be brave enough to stick with the decision and embrace the challenges that come with it. 

Own the decision! Don’t be a quitter!

How do we embrace equity in the motherhood gig when a mum is choosing to have a career while raising children?

In this century, I am stunned when hearing how working mums are cornered to choose between careers and caring for families.  This is where mums’ preference divides.

While other mums chose to care for children and be Stay-At-Home Mums (SAHM) while they are young with the argument of children are only young for a short period. 

The other mums chose to have a career and raise their children. The worst part is when they are shamed for the decision they make.

In my view, parents are only young for a short period too especially since more mums now have children in their mid-30ish to 40ish. 

Once upon a time, parents got married in their youth so they are quite young (say 40 years old) when the children are growing up and parents still can have their time for a later career. 

In sharing my view, there is no way the intention of shaming other mums’ decisions. I just want to point out the reason I chose my option.

I had my baby when I was 36 and my career was on the rise. I got pregnant, chose to keep my baby and pause my career to bear and raise my son.  I returned to work after 8 months of maternity leave. 

I consciously chose to return to work because I could see the impact of staying out of job for a prolonged time (That is for another blog).

Was it an easy decision to return to work after maternity leave?

No, it wasn’t. I had to return to work due to financial aspects because I separated from my ex-partner when my son was only 1 year old.  

Would I stay at home if I didn’t get separated?

No, because I was a career woman, I built my professional life before I had my baby so I don’t want to give up that life.

If you choose to work, you got this!

I want to share some common options to balance work and family responsibilities and survive the expectation and pressure of modern-day living that could be benefiting you.

  • Flexible work arrangements

Many employers offer flexible work arrangements, such as telecommuting, part-time work, or flexible scheduling. These options can allow working mums to better manage their time and balance their work and family responsibilities. Ask because if you don’t ask, the answer will always be no. 

Train that negotiation flex muscle. Thank you to covid pandemic for making this flexible work arrangement easier to be requested than pre-covid pandemic time.

  • Childcare support

Working mums may choose to hire a nanny, use a daycare center, or rely on family members to provide childcare while they work. It is essential to find reliable, trustworthy, and safe options for childcare. 

I am not ashamed to use all my village so I can go to work.

  • Outsourcing household tasks

Working mums may choose to outsource some of their household tasks, such as cleaning, laundry, or meal preparation. This can help free up more time to focus on work and family responsibilities. I don’t outsource at this stage, but I have a system in place such as meal planning and decluttering. (Read my blog on A Busy Mum’s Hacks to Minimalism)

  • Self-care

Working mums need to prioritise self-care to avoid burnout. This can include taking breaks during the workday, engaging in regular exercise or hobbies, and seeking support from friends or a mental health professional if needed.

I use simple practical routines to ensure that I look after myself daily instead of only attending to my health when I am sick although as a human being sick is inevitable. 

Once we accept sickness as a part of living, we are at peace when we are sick and need to rest.  (Read my blog on 10 Daily Practicals Routine)

  • Clear communication

Open and clear communication with the employer, partner and family members can help navigate responsibilities and expectations effectively.

  • Time management

Working mums can benefit from developing good time management skills. It involves creating a daily schedule, prioritising tasks, and setting realistic goals to better manage their time and workload.

Ultimately, there is no one-size-fits-all approach for working mums to balance work and family responsibilities. The best approach will depend on the individual situation, needs, and preferences.

However, for the sake of mum’s out there and for future mums, challenge the status quo to be part of the movement to embrace equity in this motherhood gig while not forgetting your old self.

Here are some ways that we can achieve equity for working mums:

  • Equal pay

Working mums should be paid the same as their male counterparts for doing the same job. This can help to reduce the gender pay gap and support working mums’ financial stability.

  • Flexible work arrangements

Employers should provide flexible work arrangements that allow working parents to balance their work and family responsibilities. This can include telecommuting, part-time work, or flexible scheduling.

  • Affordable childcare

Access to affordable, high-quality childcare is critical for working parents to be able to maintain their employment. Government and employers can support working parents by providing affordable and accessible childcare options.

  • Parental leave

Paid parental leave can help working parents take time off work to care for their newborn child without having to worry about losing their job or income. Both government and employers can support working parents by offering paid parental leave.

  • Work-life balance

Employers should encourage and support work-life balance for working parents. This can include offering employee assistance programs, wellness programs, and other benefits that support work-life balance.

  • Empowering women leaders

We need more women in leadership positions to help support and promote equity for working mums. Employers and organisations should actively seek to promote and hire more women into leadership roles.

  • Cultural shift

We need to shift cultural attitudes toward working mums and eliminate gender stereotypes. We can do this by promoting positive role models and showcasing the contributions and successes of working mums.

  • Create alliance.

We can’t do this exclusively without our male counterparts. We need to create an alliance with dads counterpart to make this happen. 

They will also be benefiting from this equity movement so the pressure of them always becoming the breadwinner will also reduce.

By embracing equity for working mums, we can create a more inclusive and supportive workplace and society that values the contributions of working mothers and promotes gender equality.

Keep well and talk soon.

Busymumhacks x

March 8, 2023 0 comment
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